Hosting

Hosting the holidays for the first time

What goes on the table, what each item means, the order the evening runs in, and when to start cooking. Pick a holiday below.

Before any holiday you host

Pick the size you can actually cook for

Six people at a calm table beats sixteen at a frantic one. A first hosting is about the rituals landing, not the menu being long. Two mains you know how to cook plus store-bought challah is a complete holiday table.

Set the ritual items first, food second

Candles, wine and the bread or symbolic foods are what make the table a holiday table. Lay those out before you start cooking, so nothing gets forgotten in the last-minute rush.

Know the timing rule for the day

Shabbat and festival candles are lit before sundown; a Seder starts after nightfall; a fast ends at nightfall. Check the date on the Calendar page and count backwards from there when you plan the cooking.

Say what each thing is

Guests love a host who narrates. One sentence per symbol — what it is, and why it's on the table — turns a dinner into the holiday. Every guide below gives you that sentence.

Blessings can be shared

You don't have to lead everything. Candles, wine, bread, and any reading can be handed to different guests. Ask beforehand so nobody is put on the spot.

Keep kashrut simple if you keep it

Decide in advance whether the meal is meat, dairy or pareve, and build the whole menu on that one choice — including dessert. Telling guests ahead of time avoids awkward arrivals with a cheesecake at a brisket dinner.

Holiday by holiday

Shabbat Dinner

סעודת שבת

Friday, candles lit before sundown; the meal follows.

Weekly, unhurried, family and community. The point is rest — you are not a slave to the week.

Study guide Recipes

What goes on the table, and why

Two candlesנרות שבת

Lit before sundown to bring Shabbat in — traditionally the honour of the women of the home. Light first, then say the blessing, then look at the flames.

Wine and a cup for Kiddushקידוש

Kiddush sanctifies the day; the cup marks that this meal is set apart from the week.

Two loaves of challah under a coverחלה

Two loaves for the double portion of manna the Israelites gathered in the desert before Shabbat. The cover keeps the bread 'waiting' while the wine is blessed.

Salt for the bread

The bread is dipped or sprinkled with salt before it is torn and passed around.

Havdalah set for Saturday nightהבדלה

A braided candle, spices and a cup of wine to close Shabbat — the spices carry the sweetness of the day into the new week.

How the evening runs

1.Light the candles before sundown and say the blessing.
2.Bless the children, if that's your custom, and greet everyone with Shabbat shalom.
3.Kiddush over the wine — everyone drinks.
4.Wash hands, then uncover the two challot, bless, salt, tear and pass.
5.Eat, talk, sing. Nobody rushes.
6.Talk through the week's parsha if you want a discussion at the table.
7.Havdalah on Saturday night closes the day: wine, spices, braided candle.

Menu that works

Challah (two loaves)
Chicken soup with matzah balls
Roast chicken or brisket
A vegetable side and a starch
Something baked for dessert
Cholent if you're also hosting Saturday lunch

Prep timeline

Two days before: shop, and bake or order challah.
Thursday: cook anything that reheats — soup, brisket, cholent base.
Friday morning: set the table with candles, wine, cups, challah board and cover, salt.
Friday afternoon: finish the food, then check sundown time and light with time to spare.

First-time host tips

Phones in a basket by the door makes the rest real.
Cook things that reheat; nothing that needs to come out of the oven at a precise minute.
Print or write out Kiddush transliterated so a guest can lead it.

Say this to your guests

One sentence that explains the table

We light two candles to bring Shabbat in, we bless wine to set the day apart, and we have two loaves because the Israelites gathered a double portion of manna before Shabbat in the desert.